The Argon Kitten

Lipton

Megan is a tea snob like me. I love it!

rosalarian:

Do you want a cup of Lipton tea, but you don’t have any Lipton tea in your house? You don’t need to drive to the store, silly! Go look in your pantry and find a can of green beans. I know you have one. You bought them in 2007, intending to eat more vegetables, but then you kinda forgot about them. They got pushed farther and farther back into the pantry. Go back there now, and retrieve those old-ass beans.

Open the can, and drain the water. But wait! Don’t drain it into the sink. Drain it into a coffee mug. If it’s a hot summer day, put the coffee mug in direct sunlight for three hours, preferably in the driveway next to the trash bin. If it’s cold, put it in the bathroom cupboard for six days, then the microwave for 2 minutes.

Congratulations, you have now made Lipton tea.